有心无力的血

近日，有许多朋友向血哭诉~

向血说出他们的苦处~

血很愿意聆听，

可是，

血不晓得血的冷笑话是否消除他们的烦恼~

也不晓得血的所做所为是否恰当~

血只怀着一番好意，

只希望真的能够让你们在忧愁中露出笑容~

^.^

诺不成，请多多包涵~

血的自诉

是血要求太高~

总是觉得不满。

埋怨这，埋怨那~

投诉这不好，那不行~

血也没好好想过，

血所拥有的可以算是很好的了~

想想那些贫穷国家，

血已经是远远超越幸福了~

白白胖胖的血还埋怨什么呢？

从没成功的血

有一件事，

血没成功过~

《旅行》

每次多计划了许多，

就是没一个成事。。。

血真是个成事不足，败事有余...

唉~

拥有酱长久的假期，

想到沙巴游玩-不成

想到吉隆坡逛街-不方便

想到新加坡看看-新币太贵

最后想到去不用踏飞机的地方了~

古晋-却因为血是唯一一个女生而不方便

闲啊~

难道血注定要待在家四个月吗？

唉~

和好

出了一身汗，感觉上舒服了许多~

今晚的表现不错，

打得对手落花流水~

嘿嘿~

血的技巧进步了，

虽然还有很多进步空间~

哈哈哈~

打完后，

血几乎把下午不愉快的事件都忘得一干二净呢~

也不想再去追究谁对谁错了~

就让他过去吧~

也得感谢血的哥儿们，

约血一起打羽毛球~

打开facebook，

让血意外的是，

血的挂名婆婆竟然为血打抱不平，

为血出一口气~

原来他是那么关心血的~

血很感动...

有这样一位朋友乃是血积福所得来的吧~

血很开心，

谢谢您...

婆婆~

^.^

重来

他总是不理血！

跟他说了去古晋游玩的计划，

血也老老实实的对他说血目前是唯一一个女生去~

还问候他的批准...

看来都是多此一举...

血都说了都不知道这个计划成不成。

血生气的不是他不批准，

而是他的不理不睬!!!

等了一下午都不回应。

原来，

他跑去玩dota!!!

看来血就连个dota都不如...

血真的对你很失望...

知道血不开心了，

还不哄哄血...

血看，他还是觉得他没有错吧~

因为他每次都是酱~

无论犯了什么错都是血的错。

他一定是说血小气，

总是下线向他示威，

最终，

他是从不哄回血的~

雨过天晴

世界第三次大战结束了~

破城还含着火药味~

破鼻还有鼻酸味~

每次起床都觉得鼻酸酸地~

想去掉鼻酸味都不行~

真不知鼻酸味什么时候才会消失...

有时候，

血再再想...

也不知是什么好~

宽恕

男：你的眼淚讓我無助　女：你懂不懂我為愛忍辱　
女：努力學習寬恕(男：原諒那錯誤)

女：不甘我們的愛死在半途　男：聽見你的心還在哭
女：遺忘不及痛蔓延速度　希望你能覺悟(男：我真的領悟)

合唱：傷口慢慢癒合　再被愛包覆

听到神木与瞳的宽恕，

感觉上再唱着血的心声...

不甘我們的愛死在半途。。。

血真的好不甘心~

可是，

血就是过不了自己那一关，

控制不了自己...

血到底要怎样呢？

血自己也不知道~

傻傻地等待~

明知道电话是不会响的~

可是还是痴情的等待~

自己又不愿踏出第一步，

我走錯一步，

墜入萬丈深谷...

血已哭不成声了~

泪也干了~

争执

唉~

他永久都不会明白~

每一次的争吵，争执，血都在独自流泪~

他认为血为了小小的事而争吵，

他从来没有想过，

血多么在乎他说谓的小事...

每次争吵他是从不礼让，

坚决自己没有错...

在他的脑海里，

错的永远都是血...

他的说做所为，

让血伤心到谷底~

血像个疯子似的，

对着电脑哭湿了自己的衣服~

又不想让妈妈知道血难过，

血冲向自己的卧室，

让自己一个人承受着这些痛哭~

血不断地疯狂，

嘴巴也没停过吃，

不断地，疯狂的吃~

简直像个疯子一样，

把milo粉干吃，

把包子不断地向自己的嘴巴塞~

还吃了一大碗的饭~

血控制不了自己,

难道这就是所谓的自虐吗？

血好痛苦，好自讨苦吃~

自己招来的痛苦，

要是血肯控制自己的情绪，

就有不一样的结果了~

要是血不在乎那些‘小事’，

就没有了争吵，

没有了不和，

没有今天的历史了~

现实的人类

还记得中一那一年~

还是只丑小鸭的血，

经常被朋友抛弃，

被歧视，

被冤枉，

被欺负...

现在越来越多人都说血化身成天鹅了~

那些曾经歧视血的人竟然跑来add血的Facebook...

还说什么，你变美了...

不介意交个朋友吧~

好现实~

血不理会他~

你们的曾经，已经成了血的童年噩梦~

一个噩梦，就凭你们的一句你变美了而清除吗？

对不起，

血不能~

血的知己

回到家~

血几乎都忘记了笑的感觉~

在机场，

血不断地流泪~

到了家里，

还是一样~

这是为什么？

为何？

血不断地说服自己...

对自己说，

他会改的，他会为了血而关心血多一点~

每晚，

血对血的知己放声大哭~

把它当自己的纸巾，

擦干血的眼泪及鼻涕......

也只有它，

观过血的痛哭，

观过血的悲哀，

体会到血的激动，

尝过血的眼泪，

只有它，

明白血的感受，

清楚血眼泪的浓酸度~

枕头，

谢谢你~

这几天辛苦你了~

谢谢你当血的聆听者~

谢谢你无怨无悔地陪伴着血每一天~

心灰意冷之夜

一句对不起真得有那么困难说吗？

算了~

血也不想再要他说了~

他的尊严比血重要，

血永远都比不上一个尊严~

血永远都是失败的一个？

永远永远都是无法当他心目中的第一位~

此时此刻血明白了~

再他的心目中，尊严才是第一名~

算了~算了~

血真的真的好失望~

失望自己这么没用~

在KL, 他让血那么地伤心了~

难道现在就不能哄洪一下血吗？

让血开心一下也不可以吗？

血真的如此差劲吗？

就连对不起这三个字都不配听到吗？

血真的真的好心灰，意冷~

你知道吗？

孤独一人行

很悲哀~

自己的男友不在身边~

说很久没有见到对方的是他，不要见面的又是他！

血搞不明白！

为何他人可以为了见女友一面，13个小时的巴士都不嫌远~

而他就连6个小时的巴士都不肯乘？

血觉得血很可怜。。。

有男友就如没有一样~

他人宁可自己少了工资，也要送自己的女友回家~

他人可为女友做任何一件事~

为什么？

为什么他就不是酱？

随血到处流浪~

血真得真的感到很孤独~

想见他，他却不肯来~

求他来，他也不肯~

那一刻，血落泪了~

心里就有种感觉~

被抛弃的感觉~

被遗弃的血只好独自逛街~

走着，走着~

眼泪也跟着走出来了~

血硬撑也撑不住~

看到血的众人一定认为血疯了~

逛街也会灌出眼泪来~

血赶快向公厕跑去~

一直骗自己说，他会来的~

他会给血一个惊喜~

这样才能掩饰眼泪，让自己心里好过点~

看着时间一分一秒地过去了~

在收到他的自己保重的讯息，还叫血不要让他担心！

他很自私！

从来没想过血看到这样子的讯息时会怎么样~

血又再次的向公厕直蹦，那是血唯一的容身之处~

转眼间~

午饭时间到了~

血独自一人在享用午餐~

吃着吃着~

眼泪又来了~

幸亏血坐在角落的~

没人会看得到血的丑样~

为什么会酱？

血太想他了~

难道见一面真的又这么困难吗？

它还说血给他压力~

说血单纯的是他，把血一人丢在KL的又是他~

在这个繁忙的大城市里~

血独自与他人拥挤的踏火车和轻快铁~

就算被占便宜了，血还能怎样？

自己的爱人都不肯保护着血~

难道你还期待其他人的爱护与保护吗？

血真的好灰心~

也无言了...

这就是他是所谓的不要让他担心了~

natcon

Finally the natcon started! On that day, I more clear about the expectation and the goal that i going to set. I made the expectation i will be more mature after natcon. Stop being naive and be a person who can make a future planning. First day of the natcon we all facing the same problem. Not understand almost all the short form appear in the slide. It is hard for us to receive everything in a day. The most enjoyable moment in the first day of natcon is the social agenda. I participated on it, i realize that, if there were participants, then a simple game will also be the interesting and joyful game.

Second day of natcon, i had been taught how OGX department works. I also understand the steps needed in order to send a EP to exchange. RM 50 charge for every EP who submit the form. Another RM 400 fee charge for those EP who passed the interview. To pass the interview, EP should score at least half (52.5 marks) from the EP selection score card. I had take the initiative to ask question, only 1 question i asked. But it is good for me from being dumb person again. I had gone through the questions that going to be asked during interview and i had chance to practice being interview with LC OGX from other university. I realize that, when i am take part on something, i wont felt bored. Not like attending the speech or talk, i felt freaky sleepy and bored because i don't have the chance to talk or take part on it. I only listening for the whole process of it. It is not a effective way to train a new IG member like me. During the discussion session in Functional Area Education, i don't felt that i had really learn something from them. I not really know what they all writing also, maybe i not yet gone through the AIESEC experience like the LC. It was a very tough session for an IG member like me to pass through...

Third day of natcon!!! Third day was the day made me had impetuous to quit AIESEC!!! There were 3 sessions of Functional Area Education. Actually 4 sessions, include the sharing moment at night. First of all, IG UMP being ignored during such session. Second, they all keep on discuss the problem or the planning of the coming project of LC. They all never realize the appearance of IG member. Third, i not understand the point for discussion, they all keep on argue none stop. I started to feel annoying, if they want to solve the problem, why don't settle it in voting? Since AIESEC is about the teamwork, why don't you try to get the final decision by voting? Keep on argue also useless, at the end of the discussion, you will get nothing. The problem also cannot be solve after the debate discussion. After the sharing moment with the LC, i felt tired already to listen the debate from them. But, it was not yet stop. During the sharing moment of IG UMP, the debate start again, i really cannot be patience anymore! Really annoying!!! I was so angry during the sharing moment! I still control myself from saying I QUIT AIESEC in front of so many people. After the long waiting of someone say our sharing session finish, i straight went back to my room already. I scare i cannot control my temper anymore if i still there. After i back to my room, Pooi Yee be my listener. I express all my feeling of the third day of natcon to her. I felt that's so meaningless for being AIESECer, AIESEC is annoying, keep on argue none stop there, really make me very angry to being AIESECer, I question myself why i was there, what is the purpose for me to be there? Why i am stupid to join AIESEC? Why don't i reject people? Why? Why?? Why??? I also cannot answer myself. Thank you to Pooi Yee to be my first listener, let me express my feeling. After that, i felt better already...

Fourth day of natcon. Again, i express my feeling to my teammates, Wen Qi and Ivy. I still can't find answer for the all questions coming out from my mind. Wen Qi and Ivy had tried their their best to guide and counseling me. Some of the questions had their answer already, but some still don't have. The impetuous to quit AIESEC still in my mind. But it's not so strong as the day before already. The sharing moment for the fourth day natcon made me cry. I really don't know i had inspire so many people to stay in AIESEC. I don't know my petty actions had inspire my friends at most during this 4 days natcon. I was touched. But i tried my best to control my tear. At the end, tears dropped... I failed to prevent it from leaving my eyes.

Fifth day of natcon. The last day for me in UPM. Lastly, it came already. The last day of natcon for me. The moment i waiting was the Gala Dinner. Yet, it disappointed me.

pre-natcon

At the first day of pre-natcon, i kept silent almost whole day. I don't even dare to speak because everybody surround me all spoke english, not because of them are fierce, is because i not familiar to the environment with english.I found that it was difficult for me to speak english. I felt that i am not the one of them, it's all because i am shy, i felt i am useless, and low self-esteem because i felt that i am unable to speak english with all of them. So, i chose to kept silent all the time. At the interview part, i think i was the only person who finish the interview not more than 5 minutes. I answer what i know, and i answer the questions very directly. I straight answer i don't know for the question i really don't know. At night, during I HAVE A DREAM session, is the first sharing session that i had after i joined AIESEC. Actually, i had make a dream to myself. I wish i could be able to speak english fluently with all of my friends. As Nicholas said, we need to have a first step to step forward to reach our goal. We need to take the initial step to enrich our dream. But, unfortunately, i was still continue to being a dumb person at the last session of the first day of pre-natcon. A very sad case...

Second day of pre-natcon, still a very case for me. During the discussion, i was still a dumb person. Just giving idea of the project and thinking the way to organize project, i also cannot speak. My brain was totally blank. Maybe i gave too much stress n pressure to myself. It made me nervous and want to evade from the discussion. Maybe i not yet ready for all of it. Or maybe i was still naive, can't receive the fact that i am going to face soon in such short period. I was scared. Luckily, there was a game started by Wiliam to let all of us have fun. Although it is a very naive game, it brought a lot of fun. It helps me to release stress and pressure. At the same time, i totally forget the worry just now in the discussion. During the program of the second day of pre-natcon, i had learn how to send email in more effective way, knew myself more, how to make a attractive presentation, and lastly get know more about the department that had been divided by Amanda in AIESEC. I am happy to get the department that i chose.

离别 = T.T

天下无不散的筵席~
这一天来临了~
血依依不舍~
也 无可奈何....
离别，是无法避免的~
让血有点意外也有点感动的是，
不懂烂漫的他也会有怪注意~
原本以为他只会送血到他家附近的火车站，
没想到，他要送血到机场~
^.^
血知道后当然很开心咯~
因为上一次她只送血到kl sentral...
其实在血去飞机场的路上，血都很开心~
却又不要让他知道~:P
这种掩饰，让血哭笑不得~
不过，血也不赖~
想到好点子来掩饰，就是和他聊开心的话题~
嘿嘿~
没想到血所谓的好点子差点就误了咱们的行程。。。
到了kl-sentral, 我们两个还不知情...
还在继续着我们的开心话题。。。
幸亏他发觉到有点不对劲了，火车停了好一阵子了~
他就毫不犹豫地问对面的乘客火车现在的位置~
kl sentral！！！
咱们两就飞快地将血的行李搬到火车外~
才刚踏出火车，它就关门了~
真险~
每想到在血离开西马之前还有得探险一下的~
^.^
下了火车又得上巴士了~
真的是一个漫长的路程...
有了他的陪伴，不管有多遥远的路都化为幸福~
^.^
到了机场，这也是第一次有人在机场为血搬动行李~
在下来的就是等待时间一分一秒地过去~
也就是等到天亮咯~
在等待的过程中，他累得睡着了~
哈哈~
只差他的‘歌’~
早餐，就是kfc的am ricer...
机场的kfc和外面的不同~
价钱特别不同！
配套也不一样...
=.='''
最终，时间终于到了~
血是时候离开了~
T.T
我们的散场就是差了个拥抱~
。。。。 。。。。
。。。。。。
。。。
。

我们的火车票



Teluk Pulai 火车站

火车里面的合照

飞机场

am ricer~

血的行李

血乘的飞机

砂劳越

平安抵达诗巫

!!!sunw@y!!!

终于，
血来到了期待好久的地方了~
真没想到，他与他的朋友不约而同在此地相遇~
真有缘~
还是血带来的运？
嘿嘿~
这个商场是第一的让血走到脚酸的~
也是唯一一个~
之前到处走都不觉得累...
shopping是女人的天性吧~
血真的很享受~
也谢谢他，陪伴着血~
^.^

大马巨型的购物广场

溜冰场

入场证

上场前的拥抱~^.^

他可爱的形象 ^.^

血的酷型~

散场前最后一幕

咱们的午餐

巴生的探索

品尝到了巴生肉骨茶了!!!
对一个不懂欣赏肉骨茶的血来说，肉骨茶只不过是个药材汤罢了~
不明白它有什么特设让人对它望梅止渴？？？

来到了传说中全东南亚最大的jusco（bukit-tinggi)
其实并不是很大罢了~
哈哈~
在哪，没得逛，就去看电影~
也顺便找找阿公~
血也品尝到了巴生最出名的cendol了~
那才是绝品~
吃的血回味无穷...
^.^

大象的眼泪

阿公

cendol

mee rojak

点击巴生!!!

离开槟城之时也就是对巴生说前进的时候~
有点紧张，又有点兴奋地~
搞不清楚心里到底是什么感觉~
糊里糊涂的血就这样神都知，鬼都觉地踏入巴生这片肉骨茶之地~
正如阿公所说，见到女的叫aunty,男的就叫uncle。
还真的把我当小孩子似的 =.=
凌晨两点半左右， 血才到达这个充满好奇之地~
节目只好等待天亮才进行~
真出乎意料，没想到我们出街的计划也是在星星下进行。。。
晚上8点多，我们才出门~
只去了一个地方-i-city.

《槟城之旅完结篇》

转眼间，
四天三夜的旅程就酱的圆满结束了~
在这五彩缤纷的四天三夜，
大家都过的非常愉快~
也很开心，
在这一次的旅程添加了许多新成员。
有婆婆（廖沛仪）啦，细妹（淑盈）啦，美顺姐啦, Celine姐啦，雨神（Ryan Yeo）和阿公（满霖）。
非常欢迎大家的参与~
与大伙儿相伴的日子，大家就对彼此更加一步的了解了~
比如，美顺姐洗澡需要半个小时或以上的~
阿公和他睡觉时会对彼此高歌一曲~
Celine 是个特级保安，身边有任何动静，难逃过她的法眼~
婆婆是个守时人，一个闹钟就会很规矩的起床~
雨神呢，是鬼故事的好朋友~
当然，也十分感激咱们的槟城朋友们~
有了他们的带领，
我们才有欢乐的旅程~

槟城之旅

到达了！！！
早上5点半血正式的又再次的踏入槟城~
^.^
而且这次不再借宿朋友的家了~
而是住apartment呢~
10 位旅客，6女4男~
早餐，点心伺候；
午餐，西餐入口；
至于晚餐嘛~
血忘记了~
哈哈哈~
在这个美食天堂的地方，
食物应有尽有，吃不断~

last day in ump (sem 2)

血终于等到这一天了~
血盼到好久了~
终于，是血离开ump的'大日子'。。。
从kk3到bus stop说远不远，说近又不近的~
咱们两的东西也蛮多一下的~
拿着4个hand carry, 1个大luggage开始面向kk4前进~
其实血只有一个行李~
到达了巴士站，咱们都累得全身无力~
也满身汗~
直躺在椅子上，像流氓似的~
哈哈~
好不容易，
等到巴士到了~
巴士司机又说血被骗~
吓到血！！
原来司机自己都不是很了解路程~
害血冒了一身冷汗~
幸亏有他的陪伴~
^.^

搬东西篇

5月14日，星期六
就是这天，血搬东西到租屋去~
早上，我们塔大学巴士又再次到关丹~
该走的地方都走了~
连巴刹也走了~
开始觉得关丹很小了~
终于，走到了六点~
可是巴士还没来，
气人啊~
血租的车搬东西是八点的叻~
巴士还迟到~
：-(
到了ump，已经7.30pm了...
血就飞快地，打电话拿车及租屋的钥匙~
天不做美，
一切都很不顺利~
车钥匙拿到手之后却拿不到租屋的钥匙~
气啊~
收钥匙的人（女）真讨厌~
一点都不肯帮血。
幸亏还有个收钥匙人（男）的肯帮血~
谢谢他~
就这样拖拖拉拉地，
血大约晚上九点才开始搬东西~
车也只好延长多一个小时~
搬完了~
血和他在糖水铺“chang腿脚”
最终完美结束了这一个繁忙的一天~

关丹之旅2之二人世界

早上发生了状况，
无法定时起程。
很遗憾

我的早餐

他的早餐

我们的晚餐


这一次的二人关丹之旅有点闷，
因为整个关丹都被我们跑光了，
已经无方向了~
吃完晚餐就起程回ump了...
到了ump, 咱们也来的及送william到巴士站~
血每次都送人到巴士站，
可是...
就是没有人送我去巴士站~
T.T